Wednesday, November 18, 2009

OBAMA'S BOW, WOW!

In China, Obama gave bow
This bothers the right wing somehow
So say quite a few,
"Do not, such things, do
You don't know to Hu you kowtow

Gary Hallock

Thursday, November 12, 2009

WEEDIN' THE GARDEN

When weather is no longer hot
Some transplants will just go to pot
But at home of hippie
When weather gets nippy
Those trance plants get smoked quite a lot

Gary Hallock

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Monday, November 09, 2009

DON'T TAKE IT LYING DOWN

If you've spent retirement days
Relaxing, you must mend your ways
Old age is seductive
But should be productive
Don't yield to the thrill of the chaise

Gary Hallock

Wednesday, November 04, 2009

DON'T BE AN ICE HOLE

If you go to frozen lake fishin'
And catching a few is your mission
Don't cut hole in ice
Cuz fish have good spies
And this gives away your position

Gary Hallock

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

NOT FEELING UP TO IT

Escorted cute ghoul to the dance
No ghost of a chance for romance
On first base I reckoned
I'd slide into second
But boobs were just "boos" with implants

Gary Hallock

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

FLEA'S A CROWD

The Lord, hard at work on "creation"
Distracted by itching sensation
Discovered that fleas
Were biting his knees
What's this? It's some sort of mutation

These fleas seemed intent on migration
In upwardly mobile invasion
He knew he'd soon find
Himself in a bind
With scratching and constant abrasion

So using his great 'magination
He fixed up the whole situation
Creating the cat
Solved problem like "that"
Now fleas have a preoccupation

GARY HALLOCK

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

THAT'S A BAD RAP

Performers of hip-hop dress dapper
With metal mouth grilled like bug-zapper
One guy tried such singing
Without any blinging
But no one enjoyed, "Plain Brown Rapper"

Gary Hallock

Friday, October 16, 2009

FUSSY MATH

Paramecium pair got excited
Attempting to mate, which ignited
A heated debate
Which ended their date
It's clear they were greatly divided

Gary Hallock

Thursday, October 15, 2009

SEERS HAVE EVERYTHING

Clairvoyants who lack much in clarity
Peer into the future with rarity
Their poor divination
Brings on constipation
They suffer from oracularity

Gary Hallock

Monday, October 12, 2009

COLUMBUS DUH!

What does "Pre-Colombian" mean?
Before Christopher made the scene?
No! Please heed this warning
It's that bad time of morning
Before you have brewed up your bean

Gary Hallock

Friday, October 09, 2009

PEACE SURPRISE

Each year, Nobel jury assesses
Which person has had more successes
In keeping the peace
Or in this case at leas'
It's the guy who has made fewer messes

Gary Hallock

Wednesday, October 07, 2009

A HEAD OF HIS TIME

Perhaps you have now heard or read
Of ball player, famed Williams, Ted
Whose poor frozen noggin
Received a bad floggin'
I'm guessing he's batter off dead

Gary Hallock

Saturday, October 03, 2009

FOREST RHYME

One thing about English I love
Is some words will rhyme if enov
Emphasis you give it
You may not beliv it
Or possibly you disapprov

Gary Hallock

Thursday, October 01, 2009

SHOP UPLIFTING

For gals who have bust line that lacks
New Playtex development: Facts?
Brassieres, feather-filled
They're sure you'll be thrilled
To see they've got down to bra stacks

Gary Hallock

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

NOOSE OF THE WEIRD

An unfortunate incident ended
Career of young gallows attendant
For he didn't believe
The last-minute reprieve
When the guy had his sentence suspended

Gary Hallock